Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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