Are you still at the party or did I leave?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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