Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Randomize
