it wasn't lemon gatorade
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
