I want to stick my p in your. b.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
