in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
A+ Viking dick
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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