And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
