Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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