It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
