Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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