i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
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