fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
