so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
