Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
