quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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