Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
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At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
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Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.