New invention idea: vibrating tampons
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
