I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
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