Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
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Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
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I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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