Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
