Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
