its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize