It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?