Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
