Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
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