She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize