Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
