he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
