I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Randomize
