My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
