Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
