He asked to "fluff my boner.."
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
