my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
