Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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