Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize