Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
