Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
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