i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
