That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
