Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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