Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
