How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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