A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
