so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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