ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize