Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
