so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize