She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
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Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
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omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk