no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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