I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
