If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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