There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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